Before you start assuming that the title refers to my marriage in any way, stop! Rafiee and I are happier with each passing day. Still giggly like on our first date almost six years ago, still madly in love like the newlyweds three years back and in sync like an old couple. Alhamdulillah and insyaAllah we'll keep improving from this point on. In fact, this matter wouldn't cross my mind if not for some divorces going on around me including celebrity couples that I think are too sweet to be separated.
Why does it happen? There can be so many reasons and they may differ from one couple to another. We just try to do our best and trust that whatever happens has a good reason. How to maintain a happy relationship? Well, google it and you'll get endless sources but it doesn't matter how many books you read; if you don't practice then you're only wasting your time. Being married for only three years doesn't grant me the right to say that I've got it all figured out but to me, the key is being able to communicate and screaming doesn't count. People stop listening when they're being yelled at. Of course if one partner refuses to communicate then there will already be trouble in paradise but that's the thing. Marriage takes two people to make it work so when at least one stops trying, then that's the end of the road for them.
Everyone in their right mind enters marriage with the best intentions but it doesn't always work out. You just have to try your best to make informed decisions every time - to marry or not (we dated for three years before tying the knot), to tell your secrets or not (Rafiee and I do, it's easier to live together without having to cover up), to have a baby immediately or not (a child is a huge responsibility so I personally would like to make sure we have spent enough time with each other before we both start focusing on another person), to fight over issue A or not (very subjective but we always try not to drag any issue for more than a day) and well you get the idea. A healthy relationship is supposed to make you happier, calmer, safer and better. If you can't find this in yours, then sometimes letting go is the best you can do for both of you.
Why does it happen? There can be so many reasons and they may differ from one couple to another. We just try to do our best and trust that whatever happens has a good reason. How to maintain a happy relationship? Well, google it and you'll get endless sources but it doesn't matter how many books you read; if you don't practice then you're only wasting your time. Being married for only three years doesn't grant me the right to say that I've got it all figured out but to me, the key is being able to communicate and screaming doesn't count. People stop listening when they're being yelled at. Of course if one partner refuses to communicate then there will already be trouble in paradise but that's the thing. Marriage takes two people to make it work so when at least one stops trying, then that's the end of the road for them.
Everyone in their right mind enters marriage with the best intentions but it doesn't always work out. You just have to try your best to make informed decisions every time - to marry or not (we dated for three years before tying the knot), to tell your secrets or not (Rafiee and I do, it's easier to live together without having to cover up), to have a baby immediately or not (a child is a huge responsibility so I personally would like to make sure we have spent enough time with each other before we both start focusing on another person), to fight over issue A or not (very subjective but we always try not to drag any issue for more than a day) and well you get the idea. A healthy relationship is supposed to make you happier, calmer, safer and better. If you can't find this in yours, then sometimes letting go is the best you can do for both of you.
Ayu likes this:
ReplyDelete"I personally would like to make sure we have spent enough time with each other before we both start focusing on another person"
hehe
Izni, lagi sebulan lebih je..hope kita boleh jumpa lagi dgn yg lain before my big day! not for tips perkahwinan but nak lepak2 dgn korang je ;p
lagi sebulan lebih je lagi before ayu menjadi puan nurul huda :D memang wajib jumpa before march! nak jumpa either on maulidur rasul or thaipusam? ayu organise, heheh!
ReplyDelete