Sunday, 27 March 2011

Shall We Dance?

If you personally know my husband, you know that he doesn't dance. Ever. Even if you beg or threaten to hurt yourself or him. I found out two nights ago that he's not a terrible dancer at all!

Our quirky landlady extended an invitation to join her dance community on a tango & folk dance night in the countryside and she was a brute force. I don't need to be asked to dance; I LOVE dancing and I've been dancing since I was six. Rafiee had to get up and join the locals as he was too polite to say no to the elderly. I was so nervous for him but he practically swept me off the floor and people were even clapping and cheering when it was our turn to swirl. He was so good he only stepped on my foot once in that three hours. I've known that guy for six years and sometimes he still surprises me.

Here are some photos from that night. We didn't take a lot mainly because we were always on the dance floor ourselves.

Thursday, 24 March 2011

Spring Didn't Start Pretty

Spring is here so even though it’s still cold and windy, looking at the glistening sun brings me back to Malaysia and immediately I’m being reminded by the smiles and laughter of everyone I know, having delightful Malay meals together and going anywhere and feeling that this…is…home. I would miss Europe definitely for it has broadened my horizon and enriched my life, but I certainly can’t wait to see my family and old friends again and to eat everything that I’ve missed for the past couple of years. What can I say, Malaysians and food are synonyms and I’m a fine example.

When you’re in a foreign country, your senses are heightened. You miss more, you love more, you hate more and you compare more. I can’t put into words exactly why but yesterday was an awful day for me and I haven’t felt like that in ages – the kind of feeling you get when you’re too angry to cry and you feel like screaming and then leaving everything behind, going to an island with people who actually care about you. It’s the same selfish feeling that you have when nothing else matters but this thing bringing you down.

You know how some things (well lots of things) are not within your control, but sometimes things as petty as having someone not following through with their words can drive you up the wall and you start to wonder why, oh why, are the same species of human beings can have a totally different attitude. It puzzles me how some people can be effortlessly polite and some are downright %&#$!

It ruined the rest of my Wednesday. It was like a blurry memory. You know it happened but your mind keeps blocking your brain from accessing the data because they’re too bloody %&#$! Too bad I have to be cryptic with my words. Long gone are the days when you were merely children and everything you said was cute. Adults are not allowed to be truthful without making some enemies. Isn’t that funny? We’re all afraid of some degree of truth that we even have a defence mechanism to protect how we feel. Some may know it as ego.

Alas, we all know life moves on and so I’m going to start today with a high dose of energy, perseverance and strength. No one can hurt you unless you let them.

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Trouble in Paradise

Waking up to a snowy morning like this is surprisingly energising. I guess having eight hours of deep slumber after a good movie (like 127 hours!) sort of help too.

Two weeks into my professional practice; I’ve finished drafting my Inception Report and started on the Master thesis itself. Right now I just keep working on them based on my supervisors' feedbacks while at the same time implementing the modelling and what I would call investigation instead of results assessment just because it sounds cooler.

Hubby’s residence permit has been denied which means he can’t work here and worse, he has to leave the Schengen area by 10 May. It’s either Malaysia (I hope not… we’ve come this far together, I hate to finish this alone) or Hungary (living apart for three months suck but at least I can see him immediately after the internship which I hope to end as soon as possible if that’s the case). I broke into tears at the Immigration when the lady told us the news. We paid £450 to be separated, how dumb was that? But well, things happen and you can't control everything. At the end of the day, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

Right. Everything else is fine. Even the weather doesn’t bother me when I have to brace myself for the long, chilly walk to the bus stop every morning. I learn to appreciate this experience even more because this is my last semester after all. It still doesn’t hit me hard but I know soon it will.

Like everything else, it has to end.

Saturday, 12 March 2011

One Week Extract

There are things you shouldn't make public on the massive world wide web because there can be nasty consequences. To avoid any chance of that, I had to delete my previous post. But once this semester is over, I can put it up again and also include it in my book.

Heh, my book.

I don't mean to sound like a JK Rowling but I've been making progress with my book and I feel good about it. I finished my outline and I'm on my 10th page. I won't say more, I don't want to jinx it. Well, at least not until my 100th page.

So last week was my first week in the company. If you took last summer into account, it would be my 11th. And it's such a small world. I was introduced to this Malaysian girl who’s attached to the Sabah branch and working in Denmark for three months and turned out she was my two years senior in UPM! The Earth is round (ellipsoid if you want to be accurate) and everything is a cycle. The possibilities are endless.

And I'm sure everyone with any media access knows that there has been a powerful combination of earthquake and tsunami in Japan. Before, there was the devastating flood in Australia. It feels like we’re in the movie 2012. A reminder of how short life is.

Are you truly happy where you are now with what you’re doing and with who you’re with?