Little Girl at Heart, Always.

Call 911. I think I may have fractured my neck and spine and on my way to destroying my sight by getting glued to my study desk and laptop everyday for the past couple of weeks. No wait, negative vibes. I'm not going to let this take over me. I'm an optimist, I don't get stressed out and I'm not particulary thinking of smashing my sluggish laptop to the wall and jumping through the glass window.

I have to rush all my courseworks (read: flood modelling + report, database construction + report, two five-page essays on database and integrated river basin management, programming + report) as this is the only so-called long break I have for this term so we're going to London, Geneva, Dublin and Edinburgh. Yay! I don't think I would have the time to visit Loch Ness for a possible sighting of Nessie the legendary water horse. What can I say, the geek in me badly wants to believe her existence but even Nessie existed decades ago, it's very unlikely that she still does today.

n.e.s.s.i.e

Reading about mythical creatures and re-watching Disney classics have become my current escapism (though the Lion King only made me more depressed since Simba lost his father, haish!). I don't know how that will help with my realistic courseworks though but it feels good to be in your own world once in a while so it couldn't be that bad. Besides, there's more to life. Let's not forget that.

t.h.e l.i.o.n k.i.n.g

Empty Smiles

These days I can't help but feeling sorry for...

i) ...the edgy underage girls asking me to get them beers.
ii) ...people who have no belief in any God, thus they're all over the place, lost and still looking for that real sense of happiness.
iii) ...those whose highlight of the day are getting wasted and being used.
iv) ...women who do not have any drive in life for themselves just because they are married with kids and that's the only thing they talk about.

I just think that these people could really use a little faith, hope and love.

A Lifetime Journey as Newlyweds

Today is our first year wedding anniversary!!! And we've been together for five fun, amazing years now. Cliché I knooow, but that's the simple truth. Rafiee casually said something I found very interesting today and I quote; "I like how we're still very much like those newlyweds - minus the wedding garments". Couldn't agree with you more hubby! 

Getting engaged in August 2008. Notice how Rafiee looked more nervous than I was? Please ignore the blue pail, I honestly thought I had asked sis to store it.

Seriously, stop staring at the blue pail.

Tying the knot seven months later! It's on Newlyweds.About.Com. You can see Rafiee's grandmother in the second photo, such a nice and strong lady. Reminds me of my late grandma.

Honeymoon in the lovely Bali. The scent of jasmine never fails to bring me back to the beautiful island.

And I believe this was when he realized what he got himself into but by that time it was too late.

A little bird found this on a kids website and sent it to me ages ago and it's actually a poem I wrote as a 13-year-old. I don't remember it at all but 12 years later and this still stands true - I'm glad I'm ME!

Denmark

Looks like God has given me a clear direction (the title is a giveaway). We're going to stay in Denmark this summer!

I'm thrilled to pieces that I got a really good job opportunity there 25km away from Copenhagan; it's a beautiful city and it's a giant company with branches in 120 countries. But I can't help feeling a little distressing for the fact that I won't be seeing our family and friends for another year. Remember Izni, no pain no gain. Yeah, easier said than done I tell you. Good thing that mama and sis are coming to see us next term so it's not really a downer. And I also have Rafiee with me which makes a whole world of difference and ahem, next week is our first wedding anniversary! I say this a lot but boy, time just goes by quickly. Whenever I get people asking when I got married, I still find myself saying "Oh, we just got married last March". Duh, it's already another March!

So back to the main thing, I am freaking nervous! What if I'm not good enough? It's like being in the American Idol (which by the way is not showing here *gasp* that's absurd!). So many talented artists, it's scary to think the odds of even getting to the top 12. I guess that leaves only one option, you have to be more than good enough.

Yet Another Crossroads

r.y.a.n e.r.i.c.s.o.n c.a.n.l.a.s

So here's my blueprint for this summer:

Option 1:
Go back to Malaysia and see the jovial faces of our families and friends. At the same time I can use the time to prepare for my PhD application. Did you know that National University Singapore is one of the world's high-ranking universities? I checked and even some of the Ivy League universities lost to NUS. Ahaa...

Option 2:
Europe is a huge catalogue and we can choose the cheapest place to stay over the summer. Probably some countryside (I'd love that!) and maybe do some gardening, self-discovery and all that jazz. Of course, studying for GRE and writing research proposal in the balcony overlooking the meadow and goats. Isn't that simply beautiful?

Optiuon 3:
Thanks to this program, I'm able to intern in either Switzerland, Argentina, India or Singapore which sounds all glorious But (with a capital B) it's unpaid because I'm a scholarship holder and somehow they feel that I'm well-off enough to work for free. Well actually, I do think working to improve the sanitation system in India is a great opportunity to help the unfortunate and discover a thing or two (and this has little to do with the AirAsia's India promotion).

And I have exactly two months to decide where to go for the third semester:

Option 1: Germany - Software Engineering and Modelling

Option 2: Hungary - Inland Water Management

Option 3: Spain - Decision Support Systems

Option 4: France - Urban Water Management

It's hard to make a choice when you're desperately wanting it to be the right one but I guess there is never one exact way and that's the beauty of life!

The Road Less Traveled by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveller, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth

Then took the other, as just as fair

And having perhaps the better claim

Because it was grassy and wanted wear

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way

I doubted if I should ever come back

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference